Complexities from the Inside

 What I like about him
 seems so far and in between 
 There are too many complexities to make it make sense 
 It used to be about protection 
 Security
 Genuine feelings through action 
 Adventure
 But, nowadays I am not so sure 
 
 The eyes see what it wants 
 The heart follows behind
 But the mind is the nucleus 
 
 Could it all be a mirage of what I truly want?
 The unspoken feelings 
 The deep desire to feel wanted 
 The idea of love
 The idea of being a hopeless romantic 
 An unplanned wave of faith stamped in bliss 
 
 Never about the physicality’s 
 But what was once perceived as intellectual stimulation 
 I was his and he was mine 
 At least thats what I have told myself
 Long night conversations 
 Early morning texts
 Memories of yesterday 

 No matter how hard I try to downplay
 The inner voices cannot lie
 Fear of Failure
 A love embedded in our soul  
 Despite the bullshit
 
 A mere inkling of Faith
 Though many judged
 Few wished bad 
 Nonbelievers thought the impossible 
 
 Love, its many complexities 
 Woven through all relationships 
 Seeking elsewhere except self 
 Changes out of my control 
 Questionable doubts 
 Only to find that the core of love all along 
 Was always deep within

 Security
 Adventure
 Eyes See, Heart Follows
 Deep Desires to feel Intellectual Stimulation 
 Fear of Failure
 Faith Woven Deep Within