The Worst Panic Attack!
The wind has been kicked out of my chest!
My knees buckled
Trembling nerves
Immediate discomfort from the news, I just received
My momma has COVID 19
But why?
How?
She is an ASTHMATIC just like me!
It’s uncontrolled!
Panic sets in, my breathing fades deep and low
I might be having a panic attack
My back, my head
My chest
My throat knots with lumps
I don’t know if I want to cry
Scream
Or blame every moment that could have been safer or thought about
The crying shakes my body
But the tears won’t fall
I am around my steering wheel
With my child in the car
I have to collect myself
I am scared
But I can’t be
“Gotta” woman up
I cannot
I park
I break down for a few moments
The fear comes out through a faucet of water
Attempting to cleanse the pain out of my body
I dry my face and repeat
I am human, it is okay to cry!
Driven to safety
I reach my destination
My arms grow weak
I can no longer raise them
Stomachs contents sizzle
Ginger ale for the remainder of the night
More rain falls from my eyes
At the mere thought of the unthinkable
Only I know the reasons why
The fears, the interconnection of it all
Matters of the past
This isn’t a lose to win
But once again the little girl inside of me is lost, Numb
Rayne
❤️❤️❤️prayers that she has a speedy recovery prayers for her and the family. It can def be very hard to know a loved one has this virus I’m hopeful for her she will keep thru it she is one strong cookie 😘
My thoughts are with you.
I want to say that part. Instead, it’s these parts! Cleansing requires removal, emptying, and shifting in hopes that clarity occurs. May it find the little girl who is numb and the woman on her journey to healing.
“Attempting to cleanse the pain out of my body”
“More rain falls from my eyes”
“But once again the little girl inside of me is lost, Numb”
Sending love & light.